I’ve been working on (for some time now) a new ‘edge’ for me – by this I mean stepping out into new ways of being and behaving that in the past have been a significant challenge for me and my leadership.
I realised a few months ago how much more determined I am and, of course, my results are remarkably different. I had a tendency to be impatient, getting agitated and/or extremely frustrated when things didn’t go my way. I’d spend copious amounts of time over thinking, generally trying to work out what had happened, moaning, ranting, getting frustrated and then ultimately blaming and beating myself up.
The last few months have been an amazing (and also challenging!) roller-coaster at times and I now am starting to see how different my world is when I trust myself and whatever is or isn’t happening. There is an ebb and flow when I trust and keep getting back to aligning myself with the reality that I do not, (nor do I want to these days), control anything. I can ask questions, reach out, be open hearted, open minded – however ultimately I don’t know what the future holds. There’s an openness, an allowing and powerful synergy in play when I surrender to what IS. So I have been learning a different level of patience, trust, openness and in some ways vulnerability.
I am truly grateful for this very forward looking perception of growth. The knowing that whatever I find challenging, even the little things, is an opportunity for me to grow. It’s never negative in the long term, even if the events or moments seem so at the time. I now see this as a spring board to access MORE of me or to take a stand on what’s important. There’s always an opportunity to develop a new or existing quality or to remind myself that my current frame…my current beliefs or state can be changed. All it takes is willingness to step into the unknown and practise.
As I type this I feel a building excitement in my chest and stomach because of the possibilities for myself and others when this part of ourselves is accessed. The part that is willing to loosen our grip, willing to risk, willing to be creative, willing to trust. I mean what’s the worst that can happen? I feel an awe and solidity in my backbone that is hard to describe but is putting a big smile on my face.
AND the other great thing is I get to work on this with clients too: how can their current challenges be an opportunity to learn, to grow rather than a fault to be fixed or to condemn themselves with. Those opportunities can be powerful stepping stones to propel them forward in their leadership. Frequently the very things that they find challenging are offering a golden opportunity to be MORE of the leader that they want to be – and that they are truly capable of. Then it’s all about practise, practise, practise – and self compassion of course when things don’t go as planned.
There is always a ‘tipping point’ – those little changes that over time will make a big difference.
Today’s big question is…where do you demand that you know how things ought to be in your leadership, your team and your life?
So next time you are challenged, reflect and focus on these 3 transformative steps to propel your growth:
- The Demand – check-in with yourself. How are you insisting that you, others or the situation ought to be? Get off your own omnipotence and take the blinkers off
- The Openness – open your eyes to how you, others or the situation actually IS rather than how you think it should be. Therein lies a realm of other possibilities…
- The Offer – what is on offer to you in your leadership growth with this challenge, at this time. What quality can you develop that will propel you forward?
Learn how to release demands those on yourself and others, trust more and change your behaviour – for the long term. Step into the unknown and commit to finding out how those little changes can make a big difference in your leadership.