FOMO – Have to or Want to?

wayne dyer...you choose limits

Ding!  An email pops into your inbox – a request, an enquiry – it might be from your colleague, the boss or a potential customer.  Its 6:30pm, you’re just about to have dinner together with your loved ones.  Do you open that email?  Of course you do!  You can’t resist!

Then, dinner is ready so off you go downstairs.  What’s happened though?  Suddenly you’re feeling a little uptight, agitated even and your mind is racing.  The email?!  You’re thinking ‘I have to answer it quickly’, ‘I have to respond’, ‘I have to get this info to them’, ‘I have to…   And then you’re eating you dinner but you’re not really there.  Your loved ones are speaking to you, you can hear yourself making the appropriate noises but you’re not really listening – really you want to get back to respond to that email.  So there you are missing the precious moments of your life with your loved ones because of FOMO – and this happens frequently doesn’t it?

Fear of Missing Out – a very common phenomenon.  Thing is, this is it folks.  That time with your loved ones, you don’t get that back.

A few years ago, I used to almost panic when an email or request arrived in my inbox.  Straight away I’d be thinking…I have to answer it now, I have to give them the right answer or else… I’ll look incompetent, I won’t get the assignment, my boss will think I’m lazy, I won’t be working hard enough, fast enough, I’ll lose my job….the list goes on.

After I took The Power of Purpose in 2010, I realised that actually I don’t have to do anything!!!  I might want to, this however is not the same thing.  This is a very subtle but important difference.  One is a choice, the other is a demand.  The other thing I noticed was that it was me adding on the ‘now’ deadline, not the person who’d sent the email.  AND I could ask for a deadline or indeed offer one.

Oh my gosh I felt SO free!  The awareness I learnt quite frankly freed me from the tyranny and grip that my mind had on me.  It’s not that I don’t still react but now I am more aware of what’s happening and this enables me to make more conscious choices, more of the time – rather than be driven by my unconscious mental demands.  Those demands usually end up with me flitting between tasks and reducing my productivity completely.  Sure, I could miss out on something but what’s the worst that could happen?  Once I think about worst case scenario, the truth is I don’t actually know that this is what will happen anyway.  Likely?  I suspect not.

So when that email pops in, consider:

  1. Who put the deadline on you or them?
  2. What’s the worst case scenario if you don’t respond immediately (or indeed until X?)
  3. What’s the truth – do you HAVE to or do you WANT to?

Come and explore how to release the demands you have on yourself, in a warm and welcoming environment, in my FREE online taster session for The Power of Purpose course.

Join me for an FREE online taster session on Wednesday 3rd or 10th February 2016 6-8pm.

I’d love to see you there…

FREE tickets here: Book FREE Online Taster for Power of Purpose

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